the best things in life aren't things
Politics
No more LOL!
Abolish the lie that is “lol”!
Over the past decade it has become increasingly obvious that countless web users are misrepresenting themselves by typing LOL (or “lolling” as it has come to be called) when they are NOT actually laughing out loud. This ruse has been at the expense of internet loyalists who add up the lols they receive in chat rooms and on message boards every day.
To better demonstrate the extent of this lie please refer to the graph below.
The National Acronym Monitoring Board of Linguistic Anomalies or NAMBLA has begun to crack down on “False Lolling” which is a class G felony punishable by permanent IP banning and in rare cases death by pwnage.To help LOL addicts curb their deceptive temptation NAMBLA has implemented a new acronym that is more accurate while at the same time poignant and conveniently recognizable.
LOI (Laughing On the Inside)
Loi is to be used when something is mildly entertaining, yet not humorous enough to evoke actual laughter. Actual laughter, however, may still be represented by “lol” or its other manifestations (LMAO, ROFL, etc).
Spread the word!
God’s standards
“I have opponents in this race who do not want to change the Constitution, but I believe it’s a lot easier to change the Constitution than it would be to change the word of the living god. And that’s what we need to do – to amend the Constitution so it’s in God’s standards rather than try to change God’s standards so it lines up with some contemporary view.”
Mike Huckabee, Republican candidate for the 2008 United States presidential election.
What a douche.
P.S. Vote Obama, if you have a choice.
Politics explained
4 years ago
in Politics
FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else’s cows. You have to take care of all of the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.
BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and put them in a barn with everyone else’s cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs as the regulations say you need.
FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.
PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.
RUSSIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.
CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The government takes both of them and shoots you.
DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.
PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.
REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.
BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.
PURE ANARCHY: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.
LIBERTARIAN/ANARCHO-CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.