Writings
30 Things You Need to Stop Doing to Yourself
- Stop spending time with the wrong people.
- Stop running from your problems.
- Stop lying to yourself.
- Stop putting your own needs on the back burner.
- Stop trying to be someone you’re not.
- Stop trying to hold onto the past.
- Stop being scared to make a mistake.
- Stop berating yourself for old mistakes.
- Stop trying to buy happiness.
- Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness.
- Stop being idle.
- Stop thinking you’re not ready.
- Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons.
- Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn’t work.
- Stop trying to compete against everyone else.
- Stop being jealous of others.
- Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself.
- Stop holding grudges.
- Stop letting others bring you down to their level.
- Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others.
- Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break.
- Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments.
- Stop trying to make things perfect.
- Stop following the path of least resistance.
- Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t.
- Stop blaming others for your troubles.
- Stop trying to be everything to everyone.
- Stop worrying so much.
- Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen.
- Stop being ungrateful.
My view on phone conversations
It’s been a while since I promised some people I’d share my view on the telephone conversations. Here’s the catch:
I *rarely answer my phone to people I don’t have saved in my phone book.
* never
Besides the fact that we are spammed with the occasional tele-marketers and survey numb-nuts even the people you know can sometimes be a pain. Whether they are just bored or seek technical advice (because you once helped them install their operating system), you shouldn’t answer. Don’t worry! There is a plethora of erotic and IT tech hotlines they can turn to.
Ok, by now you are probably saying “Man, you are right but what about business conversations? Are we going to ignore them all??!”
The answer is YES! (caution advised though)
The advantage of a phone conversation is that you get instant feedback:
“So we meet up at 9? – Yes”
“Did you buy the tickets? – Yes”
“Are you interested in advertising with us? – No”
“Would you like to purchase our special package? -No”
In business, 90% of the times that is negative feedback – remember I referred to the telemarketers as numb-nuts.
Question: How many times has a prospect called you and asked if you could help? How many times did the email follow up?
You see, as much as you could talk on the phone, what really matters is the contract/brief/research/offer -and those are rarely detailed in a phone conversation.
Which brings me to my mantra:
I tend to answer my emails faster than I answer my phone.
An email is never interrupting, waits patiently in your inbox for you to do your research and then reply. You are always prepared to answer an email, whether you are making an offer or explaining something. If you are doing business, you must have an email address. The response time for the email depends on the business sector. I reply to my emails instantly or within 2-3 hours, I consider that polite. If you are reading this and you don’t have an email for your business, I think it’s time you called someone, probably your witty nephew that once installed Win Xp on your system.
Back to my phone – I have ~50 contacts I keep in my phonebook, and I answer only to these. I usually order online, and if I expect a phone call to confirm the order I do it. Also I answer to other numbers on my birthday. I can say that these are the two exceptions for which I pick up the phone, other than answering to friends and family. Technology has brought us call barring and creating answering rules for our smartphones – I personally use a nifty piece of software called Advanced Call Manager – best money could buy. It can filter the numbers so I only get call notifications from my contacts and it automatically blocks all others including the much hated anonymous ones.
Note to people calling me: if you hear the busy tone, email or text (sms) me. If I’m not answering, I will call back, trust me.
40 things to do when life gets stale
1. Go for a run.
2. Kill a project that’s not working.
3. Have a beer with an old friend.
4. Show up to work an hour earlier.
5. Watch a good movie. (Franklyn)
6. Watch a stupid movie. (Marley & Me)
7. Quit your job. (Raz w00t)
8. Build something with your hands.
9. Talk to an 8 year old.
10. Talk to an 80 year old.
11. Leave the city. Get far enough away that you can’t see the lights.
12. Try yoga. (Not for me, Bird)
13. Go see a band in concert. (Placebo FTW!)
14. Dance.
15. Call the smartest person you know. Ask them to lunch.
16. Eat a pint of berries.
17. Watch the Discovery Channel. (they double it in Hungarian now)
18. See the world through a camera lens. Video camera, still camera. It doesn’t matter.
19. Listen to Empire of the Sun.
20. Write in a new notebook.
21. Write a letter. With a pen.
22. Go a day without email.
23. Go a week without the internet.
24. Visit a museum.
25. Tour an art gallery.
26. Go to a playground. And play.
27. Light incense and (try to) meditate.
28. Have coffee with an artist.
29. Go for drinks with a “suit”.
30. Build a fort.
31. Wear a tie to work.
32. Buy cool socks.
33. Jump off the highest diving board at the pool.
34. Email your favourite blogger.
35. Watch a TED talk.
36. Read a hard copy of FHM magazine.
37. Watch someone do something that you didn’t know was possible. (LOL – The fail is strong in that one!)
38. Spend an afternoon at Toys “R” Us. Buy LEGO.
39. Drink beer around a fire.
40. Go up to the roof of a tall building. Look down on the city.
Later edit: Break up with your girlfriend/boyfriend.
Fly away sun
Once upon a time, there was Candy and Dan. Things were very hot that year. All the wax was melting in the trees. He would climb balconies, climb everywhere, do anything for her, oh Danny boy. Thousands of birds, the tiniest birds, adorned her hair. Everything was gold. One night the bed caught fire. He was handsome and a very good criminal. We lived on sunlight and chocolate bars. It was the afternoon of extravagant delight. Danny the daredevil. Candy went missing. The days last rays of sunshine cruise like sharks. I want to try it your way this time. You came into my life really fast and I liked it. We squelched in the mud of our joy. I was wet-thighed with surrender. Then there was a gap in things and the whole earth tilted. This is the business. This, is what we’re after. With you inside me comes the hatch of death. And perhaps I’ll simply never sleep again. The monster in the pool. We are a proper family now with cats and chickens and runner beans. Everywhere I looked. And sometimes I hate you. Friday — I didn’t mean that, mother of the blueness. Angel of the storm. Remember me in my opaqueness. You pointed at the sky, that one called Sirius or dog star, but on here on earth. Fly away sun. Ha ha *beep* ha you are so funny Dan. A vase of flowers by the bed. My bare blue knees at dawn. These ruffled sheets and you are gone and I am going too. I broke your head on the back of the bed but the baby he died in the morning. I gave him a name. His name was thomas. Poor little god. His heart pounds like a voodoo drum. Candy(2006)
Taking risks
RISK(Author unknown)
To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out to others is to risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self.
To place your ideas, your dreams before a crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.
To hope is to risk despair.
To try is to risk failure.But risks must be taken,
because the greatest hazard in life is to do nothing.The person who risks nothing,
does nothing, has nothing, and is nothing.They may avoid suffering and sorrow,
but they cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love, live.Chained by their attitudes, they are a slave,
they forfeited their freedom.Only the person who risks can be free

