the best things in life aren't things
Posts tagged sex
Chatting with strangers
Jul 29th
I don’t know how many of you are awre there is a website that lets you talk to strangers. It is very nicely built and it sure as hell helps you get rid of boredom or office work. It’s called Omegle, and here’s an interesting chat I had with a Stranger.
Stranger: heyy
You: howdy!
Stranger: lol
Stranger: watt??
Stranger: ure funny
You: no
You: I am actually looking for a reason not to kill myself..
Stranger: whyy
You: I just lost my job
You: will lose the house to the bank
You: is there anything worth living for?
Stranger: yess mee:)
You: go on..
Stranger: well im worth living for you can come over
Stranger: and we can….have an intresting ‘descuttion’
You: come over where, you’re a complete stranger
Stranger: no im nott
Stranger: well were do u live
You: texas
Stranger: haha
You: u?
Stranger: well ill fly there and be there in the monring
You: are you a guy or gal?
You: you sound like a perv
You: i’m disconnecting
Stranger: im a girll
Stranger: lol wat are you
You: i’m a 37 year old single mother
Stranger: oh ok lovelyy
Stranger: im horny for you
You: why?
You: cause i’m suicidal?
Stranger: cause i like 37 year old single mothers that live in texas
Stranger: lol
Stranger: ily babe ily
As I suspect I was dealing with a Stranger pervert impersonating a chick willing to have sex with unsuspecting suicidal victims. 
10 wacky tips for recession survival
Jan 6th
Here’s my list of 10 “commandments” you need to follow during these harsh times ahead. Make them your new year resolution, and please feel free to add more to the list.
1. If you can’t pay cash, you can’t afford it. Time to cut up those credit cards. Don’t be stupid, it’s not free money.
2. Invite friends to your house. You don’t have to spend the gas to drive, and you can get as drunk as you want, since you are already home. Play some card games, it’s great fun.
3. Have lots of sex. It’s free and it feels really good. Also, you won’t need the heat as high, afterwards.
4. Get rid of cable. It’s a rip-off, and there’s nothing on it worth a shit, anyways. I assume you have a computer if you are reading this, so why don’t you try some good old YouTube or Hulu instead?
5. Terra Romana, dry wine – 8 €/ bottle
6. Buy regular unleaded or diesel (not premium or super). Your car needs to make sacrifices too. I guarantee it will still run fine. If it needs service, try a smaller service shop and not expensive car dealer shops.
7. Time to be a coupon or a discount “weirdo”. 50% off is quite a catch.
8. Keep your sense of humor.
9. Shower together. (hubba hubba)
10. Don’t pout, make “survival” an adventure.
A joke a day..
Dec 21st
“Sex is like a game of bridge: If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand.” Peter Kay
Feigning Interest
Nov 27th
Actor and musician (he’s one threat away from being a triple threat!) Josh Hopkins sensitively explores the internal conflict experienced by a man who finds himself in the all-too-common situation of being on a date with a woman who is deeply boring yet still attractive enough to maintain his interest in having sex with her.
Directed by John Killoran & Matt O’Neil. For more of Josh’s original music visit www.myspace.com/hopkinsjosh.
(via hjoldes)
